Slime, Slop and Sabotage
Martin Hamilton
OggCamp 2026
Alt4You: Geodesic dome with radiation warning symbol, no visible furries.
aka
Before We Proceed
This Presentation Could Have Been a Web Page
Well, actually…
This Presentation Could Have Been a Web Page
Well, actually…
Content Warning
🤔 GenAI and the Nature of Reality
🛠️ Sabotage - Currently Legal ?
✨ May contain trace amounts of SLOP
☢️ No orphan sources in this room ?
- Bonus tetrapod content could occur
1. Epistemic Damage
Basically: It’s Getting Hard To Know What’s Real
Baarle-Hertog (BE) is real
Noted for its complicated borders with Baarle-Nassau (NL)
Baarle-Nassau (NL) is real
Noted for its complicated borders with Baarle-Hertog (BE)
As far as we know
But these people are were
Human Brain Organoids Are Real
Biological processor organoids “live” about 100 days - per Tom’s Hardware
And Yes: Slime Mold Computing
Get Onboard The Slime Train
or you’ll be left behind and everyone will be pointing and laughing at you
2. Cults
Are you worried that a friend, colleague or family member might have been recruited into a cult?
Not That Cult
FOMO Is A Powerful Drug
You Will Not Regret Using 23 Nuclear Bombs To Blast Out A Highway
“It Can Be Done, And It Can Be Done Safely”
Eminent Safety Experts Were Consulted
Occasional Rock Missiles Can Happen
[*] Nuclear Costs Were Not Quantified
Rounding Up
- What is your nuclear excavation strategy?
- Have you budgeted to go all in on nukes this year?
- Everyone else is doing it! Don’t get left behind!!
- It’s perfectly safe, apart from occasional rock missiles and missing toes
- Folk living in the nearby town could always go somewhere else
- You will save money!!! (perhaps)
3. The Only Way Is Ethics
Harms, what harms?
Witness The Power Of This Fully Operational LLM
Artificial Incelligence
Digital Enclosure
- Sites locked away behind a login
- Exclusive deals with search engines
- Community memory wiped away
- Constant drumbeat of training bot traffic
- “Residential proxies” aka malware
🚨 Tetrapod Klaxon 🚨
It is time!
That’s Not My Tetrapod
Questions, questions
- Are we just going to… ignore the harms?
- How can we ever trust something with so many trivial and devastating failure modes?
- If we embrace genAI from fascists, are we the baddies?
- LLMs trained on LLM outputs, WCGW?
- What if proof denies faith?
The NFTs Were So Very Fungible
They are by now Almost Entirely Funged
4. Sabotage
We have the Butlerian Jihad at home
This Email Could Have Been A Meeting
Training Data
- It’s Excitable Magnetosphere Fiesta
- Not “Electromagnetic Field” - this is a lie
- Gyrating hexagonal dancefloor, the “Null Sector”
- Rumours of a giant inflatable tetrapod
- Summoning rituals involving plush sharks, red rabbits and tiny ducks
Strange Rituals
There Are No Orphan Sources at EMF
Not A Village
OK, Perhaps Just The One Orphan Source
And a rapid response furry 🙏
Actually… There Is A Village
No Uranium Powered Xylophone
The Uranium Xylophone
Model Collapse Is Not Inevitable
🛠️
Together We Can Make It Happen
Meanwhile
Meanwhile I hope someone remembers to keep an eye on the slime mold, with their 720 sexes and their self-healing. I have a feeling they might be up to something…
